Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Speaking of Perversion

Since there’s been lots of sexuality-related talk and accusations of perversion at Kill The Afterlife lately, I thought it would be appropriate to highlight an eye-opening essay by the esteemed Dr. Zachary Moore, my fellow writer at the blog Goosing the Antithesis.

The title of Dr. Moore’s post is Daddy’s Little Girls, and it will trip you the fuck out. It involves a ceremony known as a "Purity Ball" which looks and feels just like a marriage, but the differences are quite disturbing. The first difference is that in a Purity Ball, the pledge is between a daughter and her father, and the second difference is that the daughter is pledging her father her virginity until marriage.

They have corsages, tuxes, evening gowns, limos, the whole nine yards. Fortunately, these Purity Balls do not involve a wedding night or a honeymoon. It is quite a creepy concept, and comes off as more than a little "perverse" in my opinion.

Anyway, I don't want to spill all the beans. You will just have to click on the link and read Dr. Moore's essay for yourself.

7 comments:

Intergalactic Hussy said...

This certainly "really set(s) off my creepiness alarm"!

I told my father at a young age that if I ever get married he is not walking me down an aisle... I will not be "given" away because I am not property... I also said I would never wear white because I'm not a liar... but maybe that's just 'cause I'm a feminist. :P

Getting back to the story... How dare a parent ask suck horrific things of their child!!! Education should guide them to make the right decisions like FUCK 'EM BEFORE YOU MARRY 'EM! How can anyone want to get married without knowing how the sexual chemistry make work (or not)? That says divorce in a few years to me...unless you're Catholic, then it says unhappiness forever. LOL

say no to christ said...

I'm right there with you intergalatic hussy. I like the name BTW. I am all about inbracing the inner hussy.

Hey Aaron

Thanks for posting this, when my husband gets home from school I am going to show him this. As a man that loves and respects his daughters, he will be disgusted.
We both agree that we will not coerce our daughters into being paraded property like so many women are on their wedding day. Girls are NOT poperty and are just as sexual as any boy! It is NOT our "god given right" to lord over their sexual desires!

Amy

say no to christ said...

Oops, I ment embracing. lol I crack myself up with some of the spellings I come up with when I am not thinking.

Aaron Kinney said...

Thanks for the support everyone!

It means a lot to me especially to have women support these ideas that I am expressing. Of course, being a man, I will never fully understand or appreciate the woman's point of view regarding sexuality, but I always do my best to see the issue through their eyes, and to put males and females on a level playing field. So to have women agree with me and even elaborate on the ideas I express is very much appreciated. Thank you!

Oh yea, and If I'm ever off-base, I fully welcome your criticisms as well! People dont improve themselves without first recognizing their mistakes :)

A few more ideas to express:

Girls make poor sexual decisions when they are taught growing up that they are worthless or that they are thier parents/fathers/husbands property.

If a girl is treated like an equal human being, taught that they have a capable and intelligent mind, and taught the virtue of self-respect and self-determination, then they will be much more likely to make good sexual decisions.

Also note that a girls "good sexual decision" does not automatically involve abstinence or even waiting until marriage for sex.

Abstinence is not a universal virtue, and many (unmarried) women in the world today are happier and healthier due to their freedom and willingness to express their sexuality as they see fit.

say no to christ said...

Aaron

It is sad to say, but there are more men the really get it than women and even their numbers are few. You are one of the very few.

Not too long ago I ran into some radical feminists and they just didn't get it. I was heart broken, that even they have reppressed their powerful female instincts. And part of that female instinct is our sensuality, sexuality and our ability to give birth(whether we use it or not). When women wake up and realize that mother-hood and womens sexuality and sensuality are the most powerful instincts in the world, the better off we will all be. So many feminist believe that it is man that has defined our roles as mothers, but it isn't men at all, nature did that. BUT, what men have done to control our life giving abilities is to shame us and define our sexual roles. Women are forced to be the virgin mother or the worthless whore. I for one prefer the whore, it's a LOT more fun and even whores can be mothers, just not the patriarchal ideal mother. ;)

Amy

Aaron Kinney said...

SNTC,

It is sad to say, but there are more men the really get it than women and even their numbers are few. You are one of the very few.

Thank you! I am flattered :)

And maybe Im biased because Im a man and I candidly converse more with men than women on the topic, but Ive always felt that men tend to do more harm than women do to the female social and sexual roles.

Now that I think about each possibility, I think that if women were the primary oppressors of female sexual self-determination (rather than men), then this society is worse off than I previously believed. :(

But I can see where you are coming from. After all, it is one thing for a member of the opposite sex to try to sell you bullshit ideas of sexual repression, and it is another thing entirely for a member of the same sex to accept said bullshit.

say no to christ said...

Aaron said: "Now that I think about each possibility, I think that if women were the primary oppressors of female sexual self-determination (rather than men), then this society is worse off than I previously believed. :("
---
The most frightening thing is, that it is women who really inforce the oppressed sexuality of women. Nothing hurts more than another woman calling you a slut or a bad mother for for wanting a full and passionate sex life. I was deemed a bad mom by the other military wives because I chose to spend my day off to myself doing what I wanted, but made sure I made it home for "funch" with my husband. They couldn't believe I would rush home for sex over grading papers at school for my kids. Yeah, I was the slut of the neighborhood, but what kills me is, that most of the women who were judging me were having affairs, bitched about not having enough sex and some not even liking it. Women rarely call eachother bad mothers over spankings or allowing barbaric rituarals such as circumscisions being dune to their children.

Of course some of our instincts come into play and we can all recognize abuse and neglect(cuz it hurts the child), but instead of doing what our motherly instincts would have us do,(help them in a non-judgmental way) we judge them and talk shit about them, like our competitive patriarchal society would have us do. And nothing ever gets better because people would rather have someone to talk shit about, so they can feel better about their own short commings, than fixing the problem.

Being a woman in this kind of society is one HUGE psychological mind-fuck and some women can't see that the patriarchal society was founded on "devide and conquer" so even some women who have the best intentions are actually deviding us more and usually do it by zeroing in on our sexual behavior and our nuturing and loving instincts.

I hope that makes sense, I am getting side tracked now cuz my husband is home for funch. :D

Amy