The weapon? Perpetual prayer.
Pope Benedict XVI has instructed Roman Catholics to pray “in perpetuity” to cleanse the Church of paedophile clergy. All dioceses, parishes, monasteries, convents and seminaries will be expected to organise continuous daily prayers to express penitence and to purify the clergy.
Oh yes, nothing works like prayer! Vatican officials reportedly expect to see their power of failure taken to new heights.
Vatican watchers said that there was no known precedent for global prayer on a specific issue of this kind. There are about one billion Roman Catholics worldwide.
Damn, if only they had done this for world war, disease, sin, and atheists, things would have been so much better! I fully expect this perpetual prayer plan to succeed, and quickly. Following this prayer-powered permanent purge of paedophile priests, I expect the Pope to apply it to all other areas of social ill, with equal success.